Lover.

Mother,

I’m sorry you won’t get to see me in my red saree.

Father,

I’m sorry you won’t get to see me graduate from the prestigious college.

Sister,

I’m sorry I never told you about my thoughts.

Myself,

I’m sorry I didn’t stop when I was hurting.

Future,

I always wanted you in green.

Past,

I did not want to succumb to this part anymore.

I don’t know why, 

I. You.

I don’t know what I should I tell you.

Whether I should cry.

Speak my mind?

Or just listen with a butchered heart.

Sorry I make my words so black.

Purple is my favorite color.

I don have anything in them.

Stranger,

We have become friends now.

I’ll confide in you for today.

Family,

Please don’t think of me different.

Every thing you think of me is not me in any grail of my skin.

Home,

It’s the streets that make me happy now.

Different.

Lover, Myself

I do not know why I hurt you.

I do not know why I lied to you,

Should have walked out when they asked me to.

Should have broken my bones when they kicked me off the bed.

Cold needles,

Green paper dress,

I remember the blood on my chest.

Do you?

You said forget leave it.

You said that it’s over.

It wasn’t.

It hasn’t.

Now it will.

Should have stayed.

Should have been different.

Strangers.

take me home,

maybe i'll fall in love with it again.

maybe i'll see past myself and my drained thoughts this time,

maybe i did so before,

i'll try harder, this time, i promise.

take me to the same places we laughed in.

don't take me to the walls where i confined myself and my sorrows in.

lock the room in which you criticised my poems.

i do not want to cry anymore.

maybe something is broken in me.

my skin has never been touched.

I've pushed away the soul that loved me.

i saw myself around people that loved me,

they claimed i never loved them.

i did nothing to prove them wrong either.

i was tired.

i was tired, tired of being tired.

tired of percentages,

of words, of tears that never were seen.

of the laughter fleeting, paining.

i'm sorry,

sorry, you don't get to know what i feel.

i'm sorry.

am i?

sorry?

lights, in your fingertips.

you knew how to kill someone and shatter their body,

leave them on the floor,

and then love them than the minute before.

do you love me that way?

if this is love i do not want it.

are we together anymore?

are we happy?

my words protrude beyond sensible pain.

you do not understand me in this version.

every heart holds light and darkness.

my sins are not your needles.

being prolific of another last time.

we are not lovers.

we are strangers different.

always loved.

love,

someone you knew.