i hope this reminds me to be grateful,
when i am not myself and there's only ashes.
there's only darkness that pours out of my door,
i hope i remind myself of all the love i am made of.
of all the love that is fighting for me even when i do not deserve it.
i want to remember that i am beautiful.
that beauty is not toxic, it does not give you power.
but it gives you humility, kindness and even pain,
for hurting yourself to make something happy.

i hope one day someone reads all my letters to feel better,
i want to be a reason for someone to fall in love.
i want to be happy, but i want happiness for you as much as for me.
to be truthful hurts but to lie, it breaks.
it breaks bones, hearts, love and even trust.

you've lost your breath for someone once,
but you'll keep breathing for yourself,
for the ones at home,
when you fall in love, it shouldn't be with conditions,
it shouldn't be judged by anyone.
when you hold his hand, i hope you see a pretty smile in your face.
walk back to your home, watch your father and mother.
learn that love is different for everyone.
see them smile at your baby pictures happily,
you see love. because love is not just meant to be felt, but seen,
heard, read, loved, and what more.

paint your walls yellow so its sunrise when you wake up at night.
show some vulnerability, no one should have to have it all together every day.
and as i write in my study, i know he is still asleep at home.
poems that got me through school and life.
maybe you can be apart and still love deep.
i hope you remember, you will always be loved.
i hope i remember, i am always worthy of love.
i hope i'll know everyday that darkness is as beautiful as the flower in my nightstand.
all you have to do is love your own heart through all the storm.